We seem to think discipline is either a punishment or a type of nirvana, which makes it unattainable in either case.
If being disciplined means giving up the things we want to do or love to in favor of doing things we don’t like, such as exercise or a certain chore, it becomes a punishment and we bemoan the fact that we have no discipline and, in an odd turn of logic, mentally punish ourselves for not doing what we ought.
If being disciplined means giving up the things we want to do or love to in favor of doing things we don’t like, such as exercise or a certain chore, it becomes a punishment and we bemoan the fact that we have no discipline and, in an odd turn of logic, mentally punish ourselves for not doing what we ought.
At the same time that we admire the disciplined person, we are also jealous and resentful and fearful of that person. Why? Because at every turn the disciplined person is showing us up. As we compare ourselves to the person who rolls out of bed and hits the gym on the way to work, we sit on our extra ten pounds and bemoan the fact that we are not disciplined enough. Or the person who meditates every day for, well, it matters not how long, Just the fact that the person meditates every single day is enough to show us that we are not adequate in the spiritual growth department, either.
When we do show a bit of discipline for several days in a row, we are boundlessly proud of ourselves only to fall to earth with a thud on the fifth day when we lose focus and the discipline shatters. We are ashamed of ourselves and skirt the idea of getting back to the routine like a cat avoiding water.
Look at how much drama we assign to our getting things done. Look at how many “shoulds” we assign ourselves each and every day.
On way to describe a disciple is to say that that person is an adherent to a specific school of thought. Or, of course, those who follow One individual’s teachings. The people who followed Jesus were disciples as are the people who follow Zen Masters, Hindu Swamis, Sikh gurus, and all the other masters of the world. Yet all of these disciples have one thing in common: They all screw up on a regular basis. They are human. They are learning. They try, they trip, they fall. They also get up, patch the bruises, and try again. And again. And yet again.
We fail at discipline not because we are failures. It is because we do not understand that discipline comes with practice, with being convinced that the path is the right path. It is because, at the first misstep, we give up because we didn’t do it perfectly the first time.
When you were learning to walk you would take two steps then plop down on your butt into a puff of baby powder. The you would pull yourself up and take, maybe, four steps before plopping down into another exclamation of powder. So tell me this: Where would you be today if you had given up after those first steps?
We seem to be at odds with ourselves most of the time because we seem to have extraordinary expectations of ourselves while keeping track of every single misstep we make. Each of us keeps score at such a deep level that we don’t even know we are doing it.
Perhaps it is time to become more conscious of our score keeping and maybe even change the way points are awarded and/or taken away. Take a moment to consider how you constantly score yourself. Consider how you help or harm yourself at each turn. Are there ways you can shift from harming yourself? Can you find good ways to score yourself? This may take some though and it may require some changes but that is just fine.
After all it’s your game, your rules.
When we do show a bit of discipline for several days in a row, we are boundlessly proud of ourselves only to fall to earth with a thud on the fifth day when we lose focus and the discipline shatters. We are ashamed of ourselves and skirt the idea of getting back to the routine like a cat avoiding water.
Look at how much drama we assign to our getting things done. Look at how many “shoulds” we assign ourselves each and every day.
On way to describe a disciple is to say that that person is an adherent to a specific school of thought. Or, of course, those who follow One individual’s teachings. The people who followed Jesus were disciples as are the people who follow Zen Masters, Hindu Swamis, Sikh gurus, and all the other masters of the world. Yet all of these disciples have one thing in common: They all screw up on a regular basis. They are human. They are learning. They try, they trip, they fall. They also get up, patch the bruises, and try again. And again. And yet again.
We fail at discipline not because we are failures. It is because we do not understand that discipline comes with practice, with being convinced that the path is the right path. It is because, at the first misstep, we give up because we didn’t do it perfectly the first time.
When you were learning to walk you would take two steps then plop down on your butt into a puff of baby powder. The you would pull yourself up and take, maybe, four steps before plopping down into another exclamation of powder. So tell me this: Where would you be today if you had given up after those first steps?
We seem to be at odds with ourselves most of the time because we seem to have extraordinary expectations of ourselves while keeping track of every single misstep we make. Each of us keeps score at such a deep level that we don’t even know we are doing it.
Perhaps it is time to become more conscious of our score keeping and maybe even change the way points are awarded and/or taken away. Take a moment to consider how you constantly score yourself. Consider how you help or harm yourself at each turn. Are there ways you can shift from harming yourself? Can you find good ways to score yourself? This may take some though and it may require some changes but that is just fine.
After all it’s your game, your rules.