A woman is walking down the street and she notices a man walking toward her; he is walking with an odd gait. As they come closer to each other she sees that the man had a coffee table strapped to his back.
“Excuse me,” she says, “may I ask why you are carrying that coffee table on your back?’
The man stops and shrugs his shoulders to readjust his load. “Oh, this? Well, when I was little and learning how to walk, I bumped my head on it.”
“I see,” says the woman, “and it couldn’t be removed?”
“Excuse me,” she says, “may I ask why you are carrying that coffee table on your back?’
The man stops and shrugs his shoulders to readjust his load. “Oh, this? Well, when I was little and learning how to walk, I bumped my head on it.”
“I see,” says the woman, “and it couldn’t be removed?”
“Well, no, it didn’t get stuck to me. I just need to remember not to ever do it again.” The man tips his hat and keeps on walking.
This man is not only hanging onto his past, he wears his mishap as a badge. He is a member of the Imperfect and he must be vigilant. He is so attached to that one mishap that it is the most noticeable part of him. All anyone will remember about him is that he had a coffee table strapped to his back. I doubt the woman in the story could tell her friends what the man looked like, how old he was, or even ethnicity. She might be able to guess his height by comparing him to the coffee table. But that isn’t very comforting. The man has given up his identity in the quest that “this will never happen again.”
Nobody’s perfect. We say it all the time, but rather than being reassuring, it almost always come out sounding like we should be perfect. Or maybe, it sounds defensive, like when you don’t do something that another person wanted you to. “Nobody’s perfect,” you grouse, rather than ‘fessing up to the fact that you didn’t want to do the thing in the first place. We tremble under the idea that we are not perfect or hide behind it as an excuse, but we generally miss the absolute fact: We really are not perfect. It’s impossible.
Given this state of affairs, you’d think we would figure this out and learn to live with ourselves. I don’t mean that we should give up and sit by the side of the road until the recycle truck comes by but perhaps we could lighten up on ourselves.
None of us is perfect. None. There may be people out there who are going whole hog, doing ‘wonderful’ things. the may be seen as talented, gifted, brilliant. In spite of these capabilities, there are some things that this person does not do well.
How can a person be so out there and still have flaws? It is because they focus on that they do well and many of these ‘outstanding’ people have come to terms with their limitations as well as their gifts. It is also helpful to not compare yourself to other people. It’s not about height. Or status. Or ability. It’s about being your Self. About being the best person you can be with all your gifts, and your so called flaws.
Just because something is flawed does not mean that it is second rate. When you purchase a pure silk shirt there is a tag telling you that it is made of natural materials and that any imperfections are to be expected. A pure silk shirt is of the highest quality and it is expected to have imperfections. You are also made of the highest quality of natural materials so imperfections are expected. The imperfections are what make the shirt unique just as your imperfections are what give you your pizazz.
Taking a lesson means that after a reasonable amount of time, you step back to get a different perspective. This is the time to look for the good and the bad and to ascertain what aspects are useful to the present. Every situation has a gift, it may take five minutes or twenty-five years to surface, but there is always a gift. But looking for the possible good in any event is wonderful way to maneuver through the obstacles of life. When you focus only on mistakes, the mistakes only get bigger and uglier. When you focus on the possible gift, the mistake fades into proper perspective. How will any of us learn anything unless we try? And in trying we will have mishaps; that’s a given.
Our flaws make us interesting. they also give us something to strive for. If we had everything worked out we’d be bored out of or skulls. Partly because everything would be the same and partly because we’d have nothing to work toward.
Our mistakes need not be permanent tattoos nor do we need to strap to our backs for all the world to see. Mistakes are instructions, they are markers along the path: go her, don’t go there, poison ivy over there. None of us is immune to making mistakes an all of us have different abilities is.Yet we continually judge ourselves, and others, by what we can and cannot do or by what we have done or, perhaps, should have done.
Each of us has a choice. We can walk around with our personal coffee tables and milk our wounded-ness for all it’s worth or we can put that table back where it belongs and acknowledge that, really truly, no one is perfect. Once we stop trying so hard to be perfect, it will be a lot easier to lighten up and not let the mishaps get you down, it will be easier to see the gifts that are there for you at every turn. Is also helpful to remember that we usually get to do ‘overs.’
Our lives are tapestries, woven from the strands of experience. Each carries it own texture, weight, and color. Some are pleasing, some not so much, but they can all come together to make the wonderful, unique, and completely lovable you.
Put the coffee table down. Right now, put it down. Now, go add a few more exquisite strands to your tapestry.
This man is not only hanging onto his past, he wears his mishap as a badge. He is a member of the Imperfect and he must be vigilant. He is so attached to that one mishap that it is the most noticeable part of him. All anyone will remember about him is that he had a coffee table strapped to his back. I doubt the woman in the story could tell her friends what the man looked like, how old he was, or even ethnicity. She might be able to guess his height by comparing him to the coffee table. But that isn’t very comforting. The man has given up his identity in the quest that “this will never happen again.”
Nobody’s perfect. We say it all the time, but rather than being reassuring, it almost always come out sounding like we should be perfect. Or maybe, it sounds defensive, like when you don’t do something that another person wanted you to. “Nobody’s perfect,” you grouse, rather than ‘fessing up to the fact that you didn’t want to do the thing in the first place. We tremble under the idea that we are not perfect or hide behind it as an excuse, but we generally miss the absolute fact: We really are not perfect. It’s impossible.
Given this state of affairs, you’d think we would figure this out and learn to live with ourselves. I don’t mean that we should give up and sit by the side of the road until the recycle truck comes by but perhaps we could lighten up on ourselves.
None of us is perfect. None. There may be people out there who are going whole hog, doing ‘wonderful’ things. the may be seen as talented, gifted, brilliant. In spite of these capabilities, there are some things that this person does not do well.
How can a person be so out there and still have flaws? It is because they focus on that they do well and many of these ‘outstanding’ people have come to terms with their limitations as well as their gifts. It is also helpful to not compare yourself to other people. It’s not about height. Or status. Or ability. It’s about being your Self. About being the best person you can be with all your gifts, and your so called flaws.
Just because something is flawed does not mean that it is second rate. When you purchase a pure silk shirt there is a tag telling you that it is made of natural materials and that any imperfections are to be expected. A pure silk shirt is of the highest quality and it is expected to have imperfections. You are also made of the highest quality of natural materials so imperfections are expected. The imperfections are what make the shirt unique just as your imperfections are what give you your pizazz.
Taking a lesson means that after a reasonable amount of time, you step back to get a different perspective. This is the time to look for the good and the bad and to ascertain what aspects are useful to the present. Every situation has a gift, it may take five minutes or twenty-five years to surface, but there is always a gift. But looking for the possible good in any event is wonderful way to maneuver through the obstacles of life. When you focus only on mistakes, the mistakes only get bigger and uglier. When you focus on the possible gift, the mistake fades into proper perspective. How will any of us learn anything unless we try? And in trying we will have mishaps; that’s a given.
Our flaws make us interesting. they also give us something to strive for. If we had everything worked out we’d be bored out of or skulls. Partly because everything would be the same and partly because we’d have nothing to work toward.
Our mistakes need not be permanent tattoos nor do we need to strap to our backs for all the world to see. Mistakes are instructions, they are markers along the path: go her, don’t go there, poison ivy over there. None of us is immune to making mistakes an all of us have different abilities is.Yet we continually judge ourselves, and others, by what we can and cannot do or by what we have done or, perhaps, should have done.
Each of us has a choice. We can walk around with our personal coffee tables and milk our wounded-ness for all it’s worth or we can put that table back where it belongs and acknowledge that, really truly, no one is perfect. Once we stop trying so hard to be perfect, it will be a lot easier to lighten up and not let the mishaps get you down, it will be easier to see the gifts that are there for you at every turn. Is also helpful to remember that we usually get to do ‘overs.’
Our lives are tapestries, woven from the strands of experience. Each carries it own texture, weight, and color. Some are pleasing, some not so much, but they can all come together to make the wonderful, unique, and completely lovable you.
Put the coffee table down. Right now, put it down. Now, go add a few more exquisite strands to your tapestry.